The remarkably cordial welcome extended by President Donald Trump to New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani at the White House last week left onlookers trying to figure out the significance of the exchange.
For those who have followed Trump for a long time, this was the popularity-seeking president responding to someone who appears to be a natural winner. To an individual campaigning against monopolies, it signaled a potential coalition between populist forces from both the left and the right. For a local New York publication, it was simply a meeting between two men hailing from Queens.
To individuals of South Asian heritage and those who grew up between cultures, the event demonstrated a familiar and specific skillset being utilized by the immigrant son of the Indian diaspora—a skill likely refined over numerous uncomfortable encounters with elders who adopt an overbearing attitude.
Journalists from the Times of India commented in a recent editorial regarding people with origins in the Indian subcontinent: “People of South Asian descent recognized Mamdani’s polite smile, his respectful head tilt, and his overall effort to soothe Trump as tapping into a very specific form of muscle memory—the tactical deference shown to Aunties and Uncles whose long lectures they have absolutely no intention of heeding.”
Indian diarist Kedar Gadgil reflected on LinkedIn: “What Zohran achieved was neither groundbreaking statesmanship nor youthful defiance; it was merely the most ancient tactic in our shared cultural playbook—the Desi art of allowing the elder to speak while subtly maintaining control over one’s own objectives.”
Yamuna Meleth, an actor and singer raised by Indian immigrants in Alabama, noted in an interview, “We are change agents, yet we manage to retain respect for our seniors. We are learning how to operate within the established framework that nurtured us. I believe this is a result of Desi conditioning.”
CNN sought comment from Mamdani’s team regarding this interpretation. However, whether Mamdani developed this aptitude through his immigrant background, through careful strategic work by his staff, or simply by encountering the typically hostile president during a favorable mood is, in fact, beside the point. Other South Asians perceived something familiar in Mamdani’s manner in the Oval Office: his uncharacteristically restrained smile, his tone that was respectful yet unyielding, and his skillful evasion of questions explicitly designed to emphasize the vast differences between him and Trump.
Meleth stated that Mamdani’s conduct with Trump brought to mind how she handled unsolicited guidance from aunts and uncles during her youth. “There’s an inherent patience instilled in you, and a kind of acceptance, almost as if you’re conditioned to let things pass in one ear and out the other,” she elaborated. The crucial element, in her view, is “letting them puff you up and allowing them to believe they played a role in your accomplishments.”
In his discussion with the president, Mamdani appeared to execute precisely that. When questioned about whether New York City held affection for Trump, he immediately pivoted to his core message concerning affordability, while simultaneously acknowledging that New Yorkers’ leanings shifted toward Trump in 2024 due to his campaign’s emphasis on the cost of living. Trump, for his part, seemed pleased by the media attention focused on the meeting and attempted to amplify their perceived common ground. “Some of the things he believes are actually the same things I believe,” he commented at one juncture. At another, he remarked, “I want him to succeed, and we will support him in succeeding.”
President Donald Trump engages with New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani in the Oval Office on November 21, in Washington, DC.
President Donald Trump engages with New York City Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani in the Oval Office on November 21, in Washington, DC. Andrew Harnik/Getty Images
While Mamdani faced backlash from some on the political left for meeting with Trump, others applauded what they viewed as the mayor-elect’s capacity to neutralize a figure notorious for confrontation without becoming defensive or compromising his core principles. By doing this, he effectively countered the right’s efforts to label him a communist agitator and calmed immediate concerns about the deployment of the National Guard to New York City—at least for the present moment.
Gadgil compared this dexterity to a style of movement that South Asians are particularly adept at. “Ultimately, you transition to leading without the other person realizing you were just following moments before,” he observed. “To an outside observer, it resembles a carefully choreographed performance.”
Afshana Haque, a Houston-based therapist specializing in South Asian clientele, described Mamdani’s dynamic with Trump as “highly comparable to how we handle, say, aunties at a gathering offering us advice on whom to marry, the required skin tone, and the target career path, all while maintaining politeness.”
Haque pointed out that while Western societies typically value communication that is clear and direct, non-Western cultures often interpret such bluntness as rude. Consequently, individuals originating from these cultures learn to navigate a fine line between satisfying a difficult elder and remaining true to their own convictions.
“Growing up, for many of us, the necessity of doing that was quite upsetting, irritating, and frustrating. It consumes a significant amount of mental and emotional reserves at times,” Haque admitted. “But the beauty in all of this is seeing how these very traits can become assets for us, aiding us in navigating different environments.”
Mamdani’s charm offensive directed at Trump was noteworthy considering the fiercely contentious nature of the president’s meetings with other prominent global leaders. In February, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky’s visit to the White House devolved into yelling, with Trump and Vice President JD Vance reproaching him for not showing sufficient gratitude for American assistance in Ukraine’s conflict against Russia. South African President Cyril Ramaphosa experienced a similar ambush during his May appearance in the Oval Office when Trump falsely accused him of condoning white genocide.
One way to interpret all these recent encounters is through the lens of Trump acting purely in his own political self-interest, meaning that adopting a friendly posture toward Mamdani last week was simply his most expedient tactic at that moment.
For numerous observers from the South Asian community, however, the strategy of disarming the “uncle figure” should not be underestimated.
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